Don't be afraid to ask, tell, invite....

Circumstances can change so quickly that we can miss the opportunities to appreciate the people who touch our lives.  Not just our closest loved ones, but people we see every day or even just on random occasions. 

I've personally learned, over and over, not to take people for granted.  They come and go.  Sometimes of their own free will, other times by the forces that be.  So, aside from family and friends (because appreciation should be a given), here's what I've concluded about relationships with people, in general:

1. If someone has made a difference or has touched you in some way, don't be afraid to let them know.  That could be simply telling them so or it could be an invitation to lunch (even if you don't treat), giving them a simple card or anything out of the ordinary.  An email is probably fine, too, but I personally believe something more appears more thoughtful....but reaching out is reaching out.
   
   People are often surprised when someone says, "I remember when xyz happened" and you tell them that it made you think a certain positive thing or feel a certain good way.  People like to know that the good things they do are appreciated - that they made even a small difference to the people around them.  Even those they don't really know.
2. Sometimes more than a simple "Thank You" is worth the effort.  People like to be appreciated - and thanks is fine, but if someone often goes out of their way for you, it's very appropriate to go out of your way to make sure they know their kindness, helpfulness, etc. isn't taken for granted.
   
   It's just like those "random acts of kindness" theories.  An unexpected card, lunch invitation, cup of coffee....  It's always appreciated.

I'm not sure what's been going on with me the past few weeks, but I've been paying particular attention to connecting with people at work in these ways.  We spend a LOT of time at work.....and I think it's really important to make it better than just work.  I really do try to talk to people, learn about them, know what's important to them.  I gave someone an inexpensive favorite candy and you'd have thought it was something valuable!  I sent a card to someone I've had one phone conversation with just because her excitement was contagious and it made my day. 

I'm not tooting my own horn.  I'm just letting you know that I do these things, so I know the reactions.  I've also, of course, been on the receiving end, and I KNOW how good it feels.

I guess my biggest realization this week has been that, even if you think people are so important or so busy.....it's really worth it to ask for their time.  If they really are that busy, they will tell you.  BUT, you might really be surprised that those people aren't as busy as you assume they are, OR that they will actually make time for you.

I reached out to someone this week who I really like.  I've worked around her for years.  My minimal work experience with her has been very good, and she's a likeable, good person.  Things are about to change and we won't bump into each other so much any more...maybe not at all.  She did have time for lunch.  We did have a wonderful conversation.  And I wish I would have asked years ago, so I could have had more lunches just like that one.

Don't be afraid to reach out.  You really might be missing something good.....